/ By Recovery Expert

For men who watch a lot of porn, sex with a real woman can sometimes seem unfulfilling. Is this a sign of pornography addiction?

People who use substances like alcohol, nicotine and other drugs generally know the signs to look out for when testing to see if they’re becoming addicted. Do they need the drug to cope with everyday life? When they don’t use the drug, do they feel uncomfortable or ill? Is using the drug taking away from other activities they normally enjoy?

For users of pornography, the line between habitual use and addiction can be harder to find.

One of the symptoms of pornography addiction is a “numbness” or “emptiness” felt at the prospect of normal sex with a real person.

This lack of enthusiasm for sex with a partner may be a reaction to the unrealistic expectations set by sex in porn.

In porn, sex is often violent and actresses are often shown enjoying acts that would normally cause a person pain or humiliation. This is because porn, much like other types of videos produced for mass consumption, portrays fantasies instead of reality.

Psychology Today notes that in porn sex, “there is no talking, no negotiating, no seducing, no romancing, and no tenderness,” which may be leading young men to “demand unrealistic levels of novelty, stimulation, and excitement.”

The article further states that those who frequently view pornography “over time, (are) likely to find his real-world partner less stimulating” compared to the spectacle of porn sex.

This aversion to partenered sex can cause married partners to feel unfulfilled in their relationships. Co-founder and Family Liasion at Desert Solace, Jerri Jorgensen said, in regards to her husband’s former pornography addiction, “I knew that something was really off in my marriage, but I didn’t know what it was. I knew we were not really connected.”

After getting into pornography addiction recovery, Jorgensen’s husband Mark decided to open Desert Solace as a way to help others suffering from pornography addiction to find connection with their partners, their families and themselves.

“The opposite of addiction is connection. It’s connection to themselves; recognizing who they are at their core,” Jerri Jorgensen said. At Desert Solace, this connection is fostered through group and individual therapy with others who understand the struggle of addiction.

While porn sex may foster a sense that sex should be on-demand spectacle, the pornography addiction treatments offered at Desert Solace help ground attendees and help them be vulnerable and open to a healthy emotional and physical connection with their partnters.

“This is how we shift the world. Is coming out of our shame, having the courage to reach out and say, ‘This is what I’ve done, this is where I am, this is where I’ve been, and I’m going forward,’” Jorgensen said. “The days of isolating are over.”


Desert Solace is an inpatient addiction treatment center in St. George, Utah. Desert Solace specializes in the treatment of pornography and sex addictions. Additionally, they offer treatment programs for gaming, gambling and substance abuse. Their inpatient facility for porn, sex, gaming, gambling and substance addictions features professional, licensed counselors, a professional chef, equine therapy and more. With ongoing outpatient support for patients and their loved ones via phone calls and online messaging, Desert Solace believes in involving the client’s family in the pornography and sex addiction recovery process.

Desert Solace
451 N Meadow Dr.
Dammeron Valley, UT 84783, USA
info@desertsolace.com
(435) 817-1351

Note: Article contributed by KHTS AM 1220 & 98.1 FM


Unrealistic Expectations Set By Sex In Porn

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